Speaking of Speaking...

I was thinking today about how different people have different ways of expressing themselves in conversations. I know that since we are each separate and different from each other, we all have very distinct and different ways of communicating with our fellow citizens.  Some of us use our hands when we speak, some of us speak rapidly and loudly, some slowly and calmly. Some people speak with accents, (I don't have one, so everyone else does); some people only speak when spoken to. (I am definitely NOT one of THOSE people). Suddenly, I thought of the many little slogans or expressions that are very common to the average guy/gal regardless of where we came from or how loudly or softly we speak. These little gems I've heard may not be extremely common, but I've heard some of these things repeated over and over again, and I think they sort of bring us together - kind of a "Ya know what I mean when I say THIS" kind of bringing us together:

"Wake up and smell the coffee!"

"She is meaner than cat dirt!"

"He is crazier than a red-assed bee!"

"I am busier than a one-armed paper hanger with the crabs!"

"I feel like ten pounds of sh*t in a five pound bag."

"She looks like she's been rode hard and put away wet."

"Dear God, I am so CRAZY BUSY!"

"Wow! Those are some GI-NORMOUS __________."

"That guy has got to have some serious b*lls to have pulled that kind of bullsh*t!"

Have you ever heard the saying "Marital Blister?"  I have, and it is the opposite of "Marital Bliss" which, in my opinion, doesn't exist - (according to every married person I know).

"I'm happier than a clam!" (Are clams happy? If so, how do you know?)

"I'll do that when PIGS FLY."

"Yea, that'll happen when Hell freezes over."

"Go fly a kite!" (Where did THIS come from? Is this a good wish or a bad wish on a person?)

"Let's just take this one day at a time."

"The early bird catches the worm!"

"We'll I'll be a monkey's uncle!"  (That's pretty prejudiced to monkeys, isn't it? NOT monkey P.C. at all!)

"You'll rot in hell for that!" (Anyone been back from Hell to know you'll actually rot there for doing something? I thought you just fried, not rotted).

"If you sin, you will go to Hell!" (Puh-leeeze. Then we all must be in Hell NOW, cuz I don't know of anyone who doesn't sin - even by accident!)

"Go jump in a lake."  (Okay, I needed a swim anyway, thanks.)

"Like I give a sh*t."

And finally, "I don't give a rat's a** what you do."

There are so many of these things, I could go on forever. If you'd like, send me some, and I'll write another post about it. 

Go ahead, "Have at it."

But really, if you don't feel like it, "I could care less."

Cheerth!